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    21

A new revolutionary is born NarainD.blogspot.com

submitted 12 months ago by in Jokes

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I saw a boy, about ten or eleven year old, standing in the school compound and shouting at the top of his voice: ‘

“Azadi!”   “Azadi!”

About a dozen children who had surrounded him cried, “Azadi!”   “Azadi!”

Link for political satire

http://NarainD.blogspot.com/A new revolutionary is born

    9

The vanishing trick: magic for some, art for others naraind.blogspot.com

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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When the going gets tough, wisdom lies in moving away from the site and, if necessary, also from the sight.

    12

Funny cats www.youtube.com

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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Funny cats

 

    6

Rahul Gandhi’s New Year Wish: Escape Velocity NarainD.blogspot.com

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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Rahul Gandhi’s New Year Wish: Escape Velocity.

  Will the mom fulfill her son’s New Year Wish?

 Read full story on NarainD.blogspot.com.

 Share with your friends if you like it.

    15

Salman Khan to receive Gyanpeeth Award for Twitter literature www.flyingtablefan.com

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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Renowned painter, humanitarian, and actor Salman Khan will be conferred with the prestigious Gyanpeeth award for his contribution to contemporary Twitter literature, the Times of India group announced today at a joint press conference with Ministry of Culture.

    12
    9

romantic shayri in hindi jokesofindia.blogspot.in

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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हम तेरे साथ चलेंगे तू चले न चले,
तेरा हर दर्द सहेंगे तू कहे या न कहे,
हम चाहते है की तुम सदा खुश रहो,
हम चाहे रहे या न रहे..




अगेर ज़िन्दगी में जुदाई नहोती

अगेर ज़िन्दगी मे जुदाई न होती
तो कभी किसी की याद आई न होती
साथ ही गुज़रता हेर लम्हा तो शयेद
रिश्तों में यह गहराई न होती
mast hindi chutkule

    8

Shadi Ke Side Effects Are Different For Husband-Wife

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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marriage-effects

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    3

OMG! Hilarity Galore

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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A 60 yr old Billionaire came to the Bar with his gorgeous 25 yr old wife!
Friend: How did she marry you?
Man: I lied about my age !
Friend: you said 45?
Man: No!   I said 90

🙂 🙂

    3

A Shayar’s Tribute To Greece

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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वक़्त की मार तो देख ग़ालिब…..

दुनिया जीतने वाले सिकंदर का देश दिवालिया हो गया…

#GreeceCrises

🙂 🙂

    3

Pyar Mein Tadapti Bakri

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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एक बकरी ने बकरे से कहा- 
‘आई लव यू’

बकरा- देर कर दी पगली,
अब क्या फायदा, 
अब तो ईद आने वाली है…।

    3

Wild Delusion Of Tabla And Shehnai

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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A wife plays tabla on husband’s naked bum

Husband-Hey, what r u doing?

Wife-Just trying to be  Zakir Hussain

Husband changed position- Now try Bismillah Khan …

    3

How Did God Propose?

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Even God has feelings, even he likes someone and even he gifts a ring out of his liking. This is how he did

saturn-ring

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    6

When Sidhu Opens His Mouth

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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11142794_889142744478509_644041884_n

 

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    6

What Do You Learn From Shahrukh?

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Shahrukh Khan has given us a lot to learn. Isn’t it?

Things-to-learn-from-SRK-movies

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    6

Actual Race Is Not On Tracks

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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What is real race?

48c4ccc64b00672cd2152ae237d8c699

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    6

This Is How Trolled CID Troll Salman Khan

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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When one who itself is a butt of jokes jibes at Salman Khan

revital-jiyo-je-bhar-ke

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    6

Ramadan Trolled

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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What actually haappens in Ramadan?

ramadan

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    6

Don’t You Have This Typical Father?

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Nothing can excite my father except the ‘buy one get one free’ offer.

typical-father

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    6

When Two Best Indian Morons Meet

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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How can you not laugh when talking are Rahul Gandhi and Alia Bhatt?

alia-rahul

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    6

Praan Jaye Par Selfie Na Jaye

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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When selfie obsession reaches its summit.

selfie-queen

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    6

Hangover Of Chennai Express

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Oh man, Deepika still struggles with the side-effect of Chennai Express

deepika-padukone

 

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    6

Would Alia Bhatt Ever Improve?

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Highway girl has no way to gain intellectuality.

alia-bhatt

 

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    6

Would Muslims Chuckle?

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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A college student is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog . He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He saves the girl’s life, but the pit bull is killed in the process. A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: “You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: “Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl” The man says: – “But I am not a New Yorker!” “Oh ,then it will say in newspapers in the morning: ‘Brave American saves life of little girl'” � the policeman answers. “But I am not an American!” � says the man. “Oh, what are you then? ” The man says: – “I am a Saudi !” The next day the newspapers says: “Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog. 

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    12

Anushka and Virat – Another Story in Memes

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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One can’t ever tire of the Anushka Sharma – Virat Kohli jokes doing the rounds. Twitterati and related social pages went  crazy with jokes after Virat’s amazing single run performance in Sydney.
We now bring you some more to feed your ticklish side.
Anushka-Shetty-Virat-Kohli
Love, love me do, you know I love you do – often caught by the shutterbugs are these two love birds who seem to make a great couple, jokes aside.
After the Match-Virat
You get the drift? Speak with a Bengali accent (like a Rasgulla is in your mouth) and there you have it, a joke reminding you to lay off our two stars! Post his world cup performance, Virat and Anushka have had to bear the brunt of so much!
ANushka after World Cup
Well, Anushka had something to be happy about at least after Virat’s performance…
Anushka Gets Back
Well now, one can’t blame her for feeling like this….
RCB and Rain Anushka Virat
Can’t ignore the suggestion from the fans, can we?
Anushka Virat Power of Love
A lot of people do believe in Lady Luck! 
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By Paroma Sen

    6

A Blonde And A Brunette

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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One afternoon a blonde and a brunette are sitting having lunch, chatting away about this and that.

The blonde then says, “My husband’s dandruff is so terrible! I don’t know what to do!”. “Oh, my husband had the same issue.” the brunette responded. “I gave him Head and Shoulders, and after a week, the dandruff was gone.” and they continued on with lunch.

A week later the brunette runs into her blonde friend and asks how her husband’s dandruff is coming along. The blonde responded. “Well, everything started off fine, but I couldn’t figure out how to give him shoulders!”

 

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    6

Why Is Rahul Gandhi Yet Young?

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Rahul Gandhi was born with the Escape Velocity of Jupiter, which projected him to Earth.

The  reason  why  poverty’ couldn’t  reach him  here , and the reason why he is still considered “young” after 43 yrs* on Earth.

*1 Jupiter year = 11.86 Earth years.

 

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    6

Racists, Learn Something From Mario

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Do not be racist; be like Mario. He’s an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!

 

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    6

Is George Bush Really Intelligent?

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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George: “Your Majesty, any tips you can give me to stay in power, the way you have been for so long?”

“Well” said the Queen, “The most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people.”

George frowned and then asked, “But how do I know the people around me are intelligent?”

The Queen: “Easy, you just ask them to answer an intelligent riddle.”

The Queen pushed a button on her intercom. “David Cameron, would you come in here, please?”

David Cameron walked into the room and said, “Yes, ma’am?”

The Queen smiled and said, “Answer me this please, David. Your mother and father have a child. It’s not your brother and it’s not your sister. Who is it?”

Without pausing for a moment, David Cameron answered, “That would be me, ma’am.”

“Very good! Thank you, David!” said the Queen.

Then she turned to George with a smile and said “See?”

Now its George’s turn to apply the same logic…

George went back to the USA and asked Jeb.. “Jeb, answer this for me. Your mother and your father have a child. It’s not your brother and it’s not your sister. Who is it?”

“I’m not sure.” said Jeb. “Let me get back to you on that one…”

Jeb went to his advisors and asked every one, but none could give him an answer…

Finally, he ran into Obama and asked, “Hey, can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and it’s not your brother or your sister. Who is it?”..

Obama answered, “That’s easy, it’s me!”

Jeb said, “Thanks!”

Then he went back to George. “I did some thinking and I have the answer to that riddle. It’s Barack Obama.”

George slapped him. and shouted.. “No! You dumb idiot! It’s David Cameron.”

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    6

How Does The Government Work?

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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One day, a teacher assigns her kids to do some homework; ask their parents/guardians what the government is, since that’s their next lesson. Little Johnny, one of her students, goes home that night and asks his father.

“Well,” Dad says, “Think of it this way. I’m the president, Mom is the Congress, our maid is the work force, and your little brother is the rest of the citizens in the United States.”

“I don’t think I get it,” says Little Johnny, thinking about this observation.

“Why don’t you sleep on it, then?” Dad says. Little Johnny nods his little curious head, wishes Dad goodnight, and heads to bed.

Around 1:00 A.M., Little Johnny hears a lamp fall over. Unable to sleep from the frighteningly sudden noise, he goes to his little brother’s room to see what’s going on.

The small child is lying in his crib, and apparently, he knocked over a lamp, which was shattered all over the floor. “Oh dear,” says Little Johnny, when he sees that his little brother crapped his diaper. He decides to go get Dad.

Little Johnny runs to his parents’ large bedroom. He creaks open the door, and sees Mom sleeping, but no Dad! Little Johnny exits to find Dad, searching more of his large house. Eventually, he makes it to their maid’s bedroom. Looking through the keyhole, he sees Dad “doing” the maid. She seems to enjoy it.

Little Johnny jumps into the air in delight. “Now I get it,” he yells happily, “So the Congress is asleep, the President is screwing the Work Force, AND THE CITIZENS OF THE UNITED STATES ARE FULL OF SH*T!!”

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    3

Now we Know Where Alia Bhatt Studied From

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Alia Bhatt

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    3

Can’t Leave Manmohan Ji Out

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Manmohan Singh

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    3

Sonia, Jaya and Rabri!

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Rabri Devi, Sonia Gandhi and Jayalalitha were flying together in a plane.

They were just talking among themselves when Rabri said: ‘I have this 100 rupee note. If I drop this from the plane then it will fall on the ground and one Indian will pick it up and so I can make one Indian happy.

So Sonia pulled out two 50 rupee notes and said : If I drop these two 50 rupee notes, I can make two Indians happy.

Lastly Jaya pulled out 100 one rupee note and said: ‘If I can drop all 100 one rupee notes, then I can make 100 Indians happy.’
Seeing all this hypocrisy the pilot could not resist himself and said: If I can drop all three of you from the plane ,I can make one billion Indians happy.

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    12

Yoga Bird!

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Yoga Bird

 

 

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    21

In Light of the Mumbai Rains

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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funny-picture-umbrella-flood-rain-water-man

 

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    9

One Line PJ’s – For Monsoons!

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Q: What is a king’s favorite kind of precipitation?
A: Hail!

Q: When does it rain money?
A: When there is “change” in the weather.

Q: What’s the difference between a horse and the weather?
A: One is reined up and the other rains down.

Q: Why does Snoop dog need an umbrella?
A: Fo’ Drizzle.

Q: What do you call it when it rains chickens and ducks?
A: Foul (fowl) weather.

Q: What did one raindrop say to the other?
A: Two’s company, three’s a cloud

Q: Why did the man use ketchup in the rain?
A: Because it was raining cats and hot dogs.

Q: Where did the meteorologist stop for a drink on the way home from a long day in the studio?
A: The nearest ISOBAR

Q: What’s worse than raining buckets?
A: Hailing taxis!

Q: How can you wrap a cloud?
A: with a rainbow.

Q: What goes up when the rain comes down?
A: An Umbrella.

Q: What do you call two straight days of rain in Seattle?
A: A weekend.

Q: What is the Mexican weather report?
A: Chili today and hot tamale.

Q: When is Monday coming?
A: MonSoon!

Q: What do you call a wet bear?
A: A drizzly bear

Q: What does daylight-saving time mean in Seattle?
A: An extra hour of rain.

Q: Where do lightning bolts go on dates?
A: To cloud 9

Q: What did the hail storm say to the roof?
A: Hang onto your shingles, this will be no ordinary sprinkles.

Q: What did the evaporating raindrop say?
A: I’m going to pieces.

Q: What did one raindrop say to the other raindrop?
A: My plop is bigger than your plop.

Q: What is a queens favorite kind of precipitation?
A: Reign!

Q: Can Bees fly in the rain?
A: Not without their yellow jackets

Q: How do lightning bolts flirt?
A: They electrocute each other

Q: How do thunderstorms invest their money?
A: In a combination of liquid assets and frozen assets

Q: What do you call a months worth of rain?
A: England

Q: What do you call dangerous precipitation?
A: A rain of terror.

Q: Why was the blonde standing outside the department store in the rain?
A: She was waiting to cash her rain check!

Q: What often falls but never gets hurt?
A: Rain

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    3

For Those Who Hate Exercise, Here’s an Idea

submitted 2 years ago by in Buzz

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Hate Exercise

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    3

Yoga and Vodka!

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Yoga and Vodka

 

Getting Ready for International Yoga Day!

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    3

One Line Yoga Jokes – Just Before International Yoga Day!

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Q: What did the yogi say when his student asked him what he wanted for his birthday?
A: I wish no gifts, only presence

Q: What did the Yogi say to the criminal?
A: You have the right to remain silent!

Q: Why didn’t the yogi buy the vacuum cleaner?
A: It came with too many attachments!

Q: What did the yogi tell his restless student?
A: Don’t just do something – Sit there!

Q: What did the yogi say to the hot dog vendor?
A: Make me one with everything!

Q: How did the yoga teacher accidentally kill his pet?
A: His karma ran over his dogma

Q. Why did the yogi refuse anesthesia when having his wisdom teeth removed?
A. He wanted to transcend-dental-medication!

Q. What did the sign in the window of the yoga master searching for a new disciple say? 
A. Inquire within!

Q: What did the yogi say to his dog?
A: Nama, stay!

Q: What do Yoga meditation and an apple peeler have in common?
A: They both take you to the core.

Q: What do Yoga meditation and a fudge cake have in common?
A: They each bring you a piece or peace of heaven.

Yoga humor? I dunno, that’s a stretch.

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    3

Can’t get Enough on Salman Khan’s Hit and Run Case

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Salman Hit and Run Case

 

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    3

Anushka Smiling ! i.indiaopines.com

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Anushka Smiling

    0

License To Fuck Easily is With Doctors

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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doc-law

How Do  Lawyers / Doctors / Bankers Say “Fuck You”?

Answer:

“Sir, Trust Me.”

    0

An appeal to Madam Sonia Gandhi for one more supreme sacrifice naraindevendra.blogspot.com

submitted 5 months ago by in Jokes

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Whatever the reason, fate has given you one more opportunity to make one more supreme sacrifice, sacrifice of the post of Congress President. Everyone knows that Shri Rahulji is the most suitable choice to succeed you.

    0

Oh Jesus, How Frolicksome!

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Couldn’t resist sharing this…. 
Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee in St. Peter’s Square.
The first Catholic man tells his friends,
“My son is a priest. When he walks into
a room, everyone calls him ‘Father’.”

The second Catholic man chirps,
“My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him ‘Your Grace’.”

The third Catholic gent says,
“My son is a Cardinal. When he enters a room everyone bows their head and says ‘Your Eminence’.”

The fourth Catholic man says very proudly,
“My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him ‘Your Holiness’.”

Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, “Well….?”

She proudly replies,
“I have a daughter,

SLIM

TALL

36″

24″

36″

When she walks into a room, people say,

“Jeeeeesssssus!”.

    0

When The Pet Goes Wild

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Three dogs, a Doberman, a Boxer, and a Labrador are sitting in the waiting room at the vet’s office when they strike up a conversation.

The Doberman turns to the Boxer and says, “So why are you here?”
“I’m a pisser,” the Boxer replies, “I piss on everything – the sofa, the cat, the kid. But the final straw was last night, when I pissed in the middle of my owner’s bed.”

“So what is the vet going to do?” the Doberman asks.

“Lethal injection” came the sad reply from the Boxer.

The Doberman then turns to the Labrador and asks, “Why are you here?”

“I’m a digger,” said the Labrador. “I dig under fences, dig up flowers and trees. I dig just for the hell of it. When I’m inside, I dig up the carpets. But I went over the line last night when I dug a great big hole in my owner’s couch.”

“So what are they going to do to you?” the Doberman inquired.

“Lethal injection,” the dejected Labrador said.

The Labrador then asks the Doberman why he’s at the vet’s office..

“I’m a screwer,” the Doberman says. “I’ll screw anything. I’ll screw the cat, a pillow, the table, fire hydrants, whatever. I want to screw- everything I see. Yesterday, my owner had just gotten out of the shower and was bending down to dry her toes, and I just couldn’t help myself. I hopped on her back and started screwering away.”

The Boxer and Labrador exchange a sad glance and say, “So, lethal injection for you too, huh?”

“No, no,” the Doberman says,
“She got me here to get my nails clipped.”

 

    0

A PIL against Prime Minister Narendra Modi in the Supreme Court of India naraindevendra.blogspot.com

submitted 4 months ago by in Jokes

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Prayer

The Respondent should be restrained from taking any major decision in violation of the code of conduct developed on the basis of mutual understanding and from doing further damage to the basic structure of the constitutional system which guarantees equality of status and opportunity. The highest court of justice is requested to ensure level playing, to save our democracy from “Modicracy’.

    0

Beauty With No Brain

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Beauty without brain is Alia Bhatt

Alia-Bhatt

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    0

Reaction of every boss on asking for a Leave www.youtube.com

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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This hilarious video by Fokat Friday shows a familiar territory which we have all been through .. You ask for a leave but your boss gives you a look as if you have asked for his kidneys.

    0

Difference Between Normal And Arab People

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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arab

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    0

Narabali: Pakistan version of Bahubali my.fakingnews.firstpost.com

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Aggrieved by the response received by Fly-Man Rajmouli’s magnum opus – Bahubali, attache-de-culture of Pakistan, who goes by the gun-name Khatarnak has decided to make a movie that was aptly titled “Narabali”. According to the reports in the afternoon edition of dusk, mastermind of Mumbai attacks, Dr. Hafiz Sayeed was asked to weave the story. It appears that Hafiz wanted to act in the movie, but was persuaded against such an idea. “Even if we issue a fatwa to watch the movie, people would be bored as they go to movies to see someone else. After all, Hafiz was all over Paki TV”, was the logic provided by Mr. Khatarnak.

The lead actor of NarBali: Way ahead of Indian Bahu Bali who had just two Baahus (hands) while Nar Bali has many Baahus

The lead actor of NarBali: Way ahead of Indian Bahu Bali who had just two Baahus (hands), while Nar Bali has many Baahus

Hafiz had already decided that the movie consists two parts much like the Indian original, but the story will be in future, a deviation from Bahubali, which had a story in past. War scenes would be shot live, while drones are killing innocent shepherds of Afghanistan. One major deviation in the story will be there would be two war scenes.

In the first part of Narabali, Taliban would be fighting and in the second part of the movie, ISIS would be given a chance. Highlight of the movie is supposed to be the war with ISIS.

First war scene will be in the mountains of Afghanistan, where young and energetic Talibs will be using AK-47s and other leftover armament of Americans. “But it is the second war scene that will be the highlight of the movie”, Dr Hafiz explained animatedly. “In fact, for this movie, I intend to do a thesis on war sciences from the Al-Kill university of Peshawar. As the doctorate would be awarded in a few weeks, I am trying to prefix my name with Dr”, he explained the sudden appearance of honorary title before his name.

It appears that lots of drones would be used in the climax in which, probably either Damascus or Alexandria would be decimated by using a variety of weapons ranging from missiles, tanks to those chemical weapons planted in Iraq by Americans.

Junior Bhutto has already expressed to play the romantic lead, with Hina Khar as his love interest. However, it appears, Senior Bhutto has not agreed to his son playing the role, while he himself was available. “It’s all in the family and we have a way to settle family disputes. Whoever is alive as on the day of shooting, will play the role”, Dr Hafiz explained.

“Don’t think there will not be any Indian connection– One can only take Pakistan out of India, but it is not possible to take India out of Pakistan”, Col. Khatarnak said, “One finalized casting was “Asiya Andrabi” who will be standing near a torn up Pakistani flag with Paki national anthem in the background. But the one is suspense”. However, when a bottle of Chivas Regal was offered, he blurted out. It is none other than our own “Diggi Raza” in the get up of “Manthari Kaka” of Saudagar fame. When asked how it is possible to shoot Asiya Andrabi, who lives in Srinagar, Hafiz laughed at us. “Any woman in burqa can do that role. We just use her name in titles”, he explained pitying at our doubts. However, Diggi Bhai will be coming to Iraq, where a major portion of the movie would be filmed. With Dawood and Memon as producers, he was confident that budget would not be a constraint for them.

When the news of this was broken out, there was a sudden rush of buyers for international rights. For Indian territory, there was a fierce competition but finally Salman Khan lost to Owaisi brothers, who pledged a whopping $100M.

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Please be generous. Pray that mom grants son’s New Year Wish. NarainD.blogspot.com

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Please be generous. Pray that mom grants son’s New Year Wish.

 “Rahul Gandhi’s New Year Wish: Escape Velocity”

 Read full story on NarainD.blogspot.com.

 Share with your friends if you like it.

 

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Please be generous. Pray that mom grants son’s New Year Wish.

 

“Rahul Gandhi’s New Year Wish: Escape Velocity”

 

 

Read full story on NarainD.blogspot.com.

 

Share with your friends if you like it.

 

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Inspired by FTII, Shinde Balwadi students demand a principal with proven track record my.fakingnews.firstpost.com

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Ahmednagar. After observing the ongoing Tamasha over the Gajodhar Bhai’s appointment as director, FTII, students of Shinde Balwadi near Ahmed Nagar have realized they too deserve a head who should be with a proven track record, if not a celebrity.

“It is simply a discrimination against us poor villagers” leader of the students Raju Wagh had told the correspondent. “For the last two years I am attending the school, despite the midday meals was not so tasty. And I am clearly disappointed with the results of two years I wasted in the school. It took teacher one full year to teach us Marathi alphabet. Then she started English alphabet. By the time we progressed to G, H; we already forgot Marathi alphabet”. Master Wagh paused to blow his nose and laughed shyly.

Another group comprising NaMo Bhakts (in Saffron Dress).

Another group comprising NaMo Bhakts (in Saffron Dress).

“What qualities you look for in your principal” when the reporter queried, Wagh looked at his supporters patronizingly and sighed. He waved his hand at the kids from nearby four villages. “See these kids. They live in the second India of Rahul Gandhi. And Rahul Gandhi doesn’t know we live here” he exclaimed.

When the reporter repeated the question about the qualifications, Wagh became alert. He replied in a cautious tone, “First, it should be a female teacher. She should be designated as Principal of our Balwadi. Her highest qualification should be SSC, which she should not have passed her SSC even in second class. We want a lady with below average study record only. These teachers with high IQ look down upon us and mistreat”, he paused. In a low tone, he said “The point is it is easy to manage less educated one. If an intelligent person like Rahul Gandhi becomes teacher, he starts asking all unnecessary questions and disrupts classes”.

Meanwhile, one of his supporters brought sweet Lassi for Raju Wagh that he drank in one long sip.

Stretching his hands, Raju explained his future plans. “In our class there is a girl named Kalavathi. Please inform Mr Rahul Gandhi about her and our fight. Tell him to do a Padayatra in support of our cause. Even if we get our Arvind, it is OK. There used to be a poet in his team”, Raju turned to his gang of kids and inquired. “Yeah! Some Viswas. Tell Arvind to send him here. We can have some time pass”.

It appears that there is a rival group of Raju in the Balwadi. Another batch of kids came in a procession chanting, “NaMo, NaMo”, like Naga-Sadhus. Raju pointed at them and said, “See the blind Bhakts. They don’t have a vision for our future and are content with the existing teacher”.

Exhausted on listening these arguments, reporter asked Raju about the existing teacher. Raju, aping NaMo, simply turned his head in another direction looking at Kalavathi. Suddenly, he saw someone coming and ran away. Kalavathi came forward and said, “She is his mother and our teacher. And a strict one. He simply can’t stand her at home and in school. That is the crux of the problem”.

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Narendra Modi echoes Aamir Khan’s sentiments, says he is already living outside India because of int www.flyingtablefan.com

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After Aamir Khan made a startling revelation that he is contemplating on leaving the country, and was subsequently lambasted by everyone including his grocery shop owner, he finally found support from an unexpected quarter, as Prime Minister Narendra Modi stated that the reason behind his frequent foreign trips is the same wicked intolerance…continue reading

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Rahul Gandhi is getting ready to beat Modi naraind.blogspot.com

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‘While you are getting the flying flat ready I will sleep in a bus. I have no time to waste. I have to beat Modi at any cost.’

 

Link

 

https://NarainD.blogspot.com/Rahul Gandhi is getting ready to beat Modi

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Latest fad: Spy cameraman of ‘Cheat Sheet’ my.fakingnews.firstpost.com

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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Irked with the fact that the photograph by Prem Singh, photojournalist from The Telegraph stole the limelight on the penultimate day of monsoon session of the Parliament, established news agencies, TOI & NDTV have fired their correspondents on duty in Parliament on the fateful day.

That priceless capture which made nation's day and questioned many photo journalists' talent!

That priceless capture which made nation’s day and questioned many photo journalists’ talent!

TOI’s Urn-ab-GO-Swami who felt insulted that for the first time, it was not his shrilling voice but a silent photo that viewers across nation preferred to pass their time. As his news hour registered least TRP in the last two years, on Thursday night, furious Swami called his team that was present in the Parliament covering proceedings that did not happen in the last two weeks.

“The nation wants to know – how and why you could not take a snap of the cheat sheet, while someone from a local newspaper could do it”, Urn-ab roared making the reporting team shiver with chills down their spines.

After firing them immediately, he called the more talented wing of TOI, the one that covers bosoms of Bollywood and asked for the photographer of Piku’s cleavage. “I think he is more needed in Parliament, given his skills of zooming onto body parts of people and photograph them, without their realisation. I strongly recommend him to be transferred to the news division that provides real news sometimes at least.

Burkha Datt, on the other hand was more lenient on her team and gave them two options. Either to report war news from border or leave. The wise team has exercised their wisdom and resigned from NDTV on their own. When his wife asked why he chose to resign, the cameraman told his wife, “Burkha wants us to work from the Pakistani side of the border and not from Indian side”.

Meanwhile, it was rumoured that Ram Gopal Varma and Mahesh Bhat have already contacted Prem Singh of cheat sheet fame offering him work in their next projects, both of which he declined. Buoyed by the new found fame, Prem Singh had set his eyes on a higher standard and was expecting a job in SS Rajamouli’s next project. However, when he came to know that this director works with only software engineers and creates a movie through software, and doesn’t need physical persons, he felt aghast.

However, as per the latest news reports, he was chosen by the NSA to act as a secrete cameraman, to take photographs of cross-border terrorists, by zooming into the valleys of Kashmir and sand dunes of Rajasthan, which he readily accepted. “I may be considered for CEO by Google images one day”, he happily said at the prospect of zooming through satellite cameras and thanked Rahul Gandhi for providing the breakthrough.

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Liberal journalist alleges ISI network in India, moved to ‘Food and Beverage’ section www.flyingtablefan.com

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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In a sudden fit of patriotism, a journalist with a leading commercial broadcasting television network posted a series of tweets accusing ISI of recruiting spies in India, and he did not stop there.  In an act of brazen treachery, he then slammed his fellow liberals across the nation for their silence on the issue.  Little did he know that his senior editor was following him on Twitter under a pseudonym…

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Parking Board In India

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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parking-in-india

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Thank your star Mr Modi, we are the most tolerant opposition party naraind.blogspot.com

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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Thank your star Mr Modi, we are the most tolerant opposition party

 

A political satire

 

Read full story on NarainD.blogspot.com.

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A decaying ‘old age home’ and its owners naraind.blogspot.com

submitted 11 months ago by in Jokes

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In our country there is an iconic ‘old age home’. Surprisingly, it has not yet been declared a national, if not an international, heritage to be protected from vandals.

 

Link for the satire

 

 

https://NarainD.blogspot.com/A decaying ‘old age home’ and its owners

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When You Misinterpret The Doctor

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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funny

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How did Rahul Gandhi declare he was a British citizen? An inside story naraind.blogspot.com

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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How did Rahul Gandhi declare he was a British citizen?

 

Read insider story on NarainD.blogspot.com

 

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Woman’s First Date

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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first-date

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FIRST REACTIONS to the demonetization operation i.indiaopines.com

submitted 4 months ago by in Jokes

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And in my own little world, such were the first reactions to the great demonetization  operation unleashed on a very unsuspecting public that night.

Here’s our very own drama , what with the callback on the Rs 1000 and Rs 500 notes and how the humble Rs 100 suddenly reigns supreme.

The husband man (the cool one) -“I have few hundreds in my wallets ( knowing him, probably two) + the card , so we should be fine for a few days . Chill lady, you look more worried than the ones who have stacks of notes stashed under their mattress”. (Goes back to  staring blankly at the television screen)

Sonny boy ( the clever one) – “Amma , I have some ( he won’t disclose how many ) 1000’s and 500’s in my piggy bank  and I don’t have a bank account to deposit them. Oh ! I’m doomed”.

Me ( the organised but hassled one) – Quickly thinking  ‘Thank God it’s not the first few days of the month , domestic help salaries-check, football fees -check, milk coupon -check, gas cylinder refill – check , for everything else there is BIG BASKET’. Oh my !! , sighs and repeatedly counts ( yet again ) the remaining hundreds in her wallet.

Domestic help( the ignorant one)– Don’t worry Amma, The larger currency has no value anyway, I just bought Rs 2000 worth of stuffed toys from a local vendor who came by this morning and was accepting our 1000’s and 500’s. *Smirks proudly. Now I don’t have any larger currency notes left , so no hassle of bank deposit 🙂

The cylinder delivery boy ( the confident one)– “And that will be Rs 570 Ma’am” . After a fair bit of rummaging in  various bags and wallets, I proudly fish out and display five Rs 100 notes +70. He gives me  knowing lopsided grin and quips ” But I’m accepting the Rs 500 note Ma’am” . WTF !

The banker cousin (the troubled one)- “The next few days are gonna be .. well, really interesting. May be this is the time to avail all my accumulated leave”

The Spider on the tap ( the unaffected one)- Oh yeah , it’s sure great to be a human being !

And so the days pass. This too shall pass away.

Until then, Thank God for Small mercies like the unprecedented win of (the Republican one). * wink

P.S.

 

Thanks for reading. I’m open to further comments and discussions and can be reached on Facebook  via the id Rashmi Pai-Prabhu.

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Lighter banter, December 2015 special issue naraind.blogspot.com

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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Lighter banter, December 2015 special  issue

 

Is RahulGandhi still a kid?

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Lighter Banter, November 2015 issue naraind.blogspot.com

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Lighter Banter, November 2015 issue

 

How did Rahul Gandhi declare he was a British citizen?

Read inside story on NarainD.blogspot.com

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THE MINISTER’S TOWEL sunjaykumarsingh.blogspot.in

submitted 1 year ago by in Jokes

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The minister’s towel was nowhere to be seen. It was absolutely urgent that it was found. Or heads were going to roll. After an earth-shaking hunt, it was finally unearthed. But from where and how ?

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Never Mess With Lawyers

submitted 2 years ago by in Jokes

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5 Doctors and 5 lawyers are travelling by rail from Pune to Mumbai.

They gather at Pune Railway Station.

Both groups desperately try to prove their superiority.

SCENE 1 (PUNE-MUMBAI): ————————————– 5 lawyers  buy only 1 ticket, and 5 doctors buy 5 tickets. doctors are desperately waiting for TC to come

When TC arrives, all 5 lawyers get into one toilet, so when TC knocks, one hand comes out with the ticket and the TC goes away.

On the return journey, they don’t get a direct train to Pune, so both group decide to take a passenger train till Lonavala, from there they can easily get a Local Train to Pune.

SCENE 2 (MUMBAI-LONAVALA): ——————————————–

Doctorss decided, “This time, we will prove that we are smarter”.

5 doctors buy 1 ticket,  lawyers don’t buy any ticket at all ! TC arrives

All doctor IN ONE TOILET.

ALL lawyers IN THE OPPOSITE TOILET.

One Lawyer gets out and knocks the door of doctor toilet.

One doctor’s hand comes out with the tickets,

lawyer takes the ticket and enters toilet.

TC drives out all the doctor from the toilet,

And they are heavily fined.

SCENE 3 (LONAVALA): ——————————– Now, both the groups are at LONAVALA Railway Station.

Doctors are planning their move for a last chance, They board the local train to Pune.

This time, doctors decide that they will play the same (1 ticket) trick.

ALL doctors take 1 ticket

lawyers buy 5 tickets.

TC Comes. All lawyers show their tickets,

AND Doctors are still searching for toilet in the Local train!!!!!

funny-lawyer-cartoon

Conclusion : Don’t mess with lawyers

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